Finding a balance

Studying abroad is an amazing adventure where so many crazy opportunities will present themselves. You will constantly have to make decisions about what is worth your time and what isn’t. In a summer program especially, it feels like there will never be enough time to accomplish everything. The sad truth is that sometimes you will have to choose doing homework over some of those amazing experiences. For every activity or excursion, I have a little voice in the back of my head reminding me that homework and school still exist. Sometimes the voice is loud and present and sometimes it’s barely a whisper.

On my second weekend in Spain, I took a trip to Rome and it was amazing. We saw the Colosseum, the Roman Forum, the Trevi fountain, the Pantheon, and the Vatican. I didn’t work on any of my homework beforehand and didn’t bring anything to work on while I was there. When we finally got back on Sunday around 7pm, I realized I had made a huge mistake. I was completely exhausted from the weekend and still had several assignments due the following day. I got through them and took an epic nap the next day, but I knew I should have let that voice in my head be stronger than a whisper.

These are my tips for balancing schoolwork with the amazing experiences that come with studying abroad:

1    1. Don’t try to do everything:

There’s so much to do and so little time, but that doesn’t mean you should fill every waking second with activities. You will get burnt out and all the cool things you did will run together in a blur of exhaustion and your school work will suffer. Find the things you think will give you the best memories and stick with them. That brings me to the second tip:

2.  Choose unique experiences:

Before you decide to spend precious time and money on something, ask yourself this question: Could I do this in the U.S. and have the same experience? If the answer is undeniably yes, then don’t do it! You need time for homework as it is and the valuable time you do have should be spent trying new and exciting things that you couldn’t do at home. Whether it’s getting late night tapas or taking a day trip to Montserrat, there will be opportunities that are unique to where you’re studying. Make those a priority and use your left over time to study.

3. Don’t procrastinate:

This is one of the oldest tips in the book, but it’s still true. The worst thing you can do while studying abroad is procrastinate your school work. If you leave it to the last minute, then something cool will inevitably be happening and you will either not be able to go, stay up all night doing homework, or not do it all. None of those are good options. Save yourself the headache and do homework ahead of time whenever possible. 

4. Know your limits:

There will always be people who seemingly don’t need sleep and manage to do everything. Maybe you are one of those people, but odds are you need sleep and down time like the rest of us. If you’re already tired and you have a mountain of homework, don’t go for a two-hour hike that’s all uphill. That being said, don’t let feeling tired or busy keep you from doing cool stuff. It’s all about finding a balance.

Italian Hospitality:

This weekend I visited Rome with some friends from the Barcelona program. We stayed with an Italian family, whose daughter (Giulia) is friends with one of the girls in our group. It was an amazing experience, not only because Rome is a beautiful city filled with gelato, but because the family we stayed with was wonderful. They picked us up from the airport, cooked us a delicious lunch, and took care of us in every way possible for the weekend. I had the opportunity to talk with Giulia’s mom, Carla, while we were there.

Carla is very Italian. She kissed us on the cheeks, made us some delicious spaghetti, and said Mamma Mia on more than one occasion (and not in reference to the movie). I had the chance to talk to her one night and learned a lot from our conversation. I learned that communicating is about so much more than language and that really listening to someone can be hard, but rewarding. Carla was as interesting to talk to as she was kind, and I could have listened to her all night. This is my advice for communicating with someone from a different culture:

1. Don’t be condescending

I didn’t talk as quickly when I spoke with Carla, but I also didn’t yell or talk at a rate of ten words per minute. She wasn’t fluent in English, but she was smart, funny, and had a great personality. Just because someone doesn’t speak the same language doesn’t mean that person is unintelligent or dull.

      2. Be open minded

This tip sounds cliché because it is, but it’s still valid. Someone from a completely different culture isn’t going to share all of your opinions and experiences. See the differences as interesting rather than wrong while also finding the similarities. Carla’s use of Italian phrases as well as her perspective on life made it that much more interesting to talk with her. 

3. Listen

Listening seems like an obvious part of communication and yet so many people forget to do it. Quit thinking about what you’re going to say next and actually focus on what the other person is saying, especially if that person has an Italian accent.

It's called culture shock for a reason.

I knew it would happen when I studied abroad for a month in Barcelona, far from Purdue's campus, but it was a shock all the same. Barcelona is not West Lafayette. It's different in almost every way imaginable and I'm far from learning all the details of Barcelona that make it unique. I had a few moments when the differences became extremely clear. 

When I got on the metro and had someone standing so close behind me that I could feel him breathing on my neck, I told myself it was just part of the culture (and later convinced myself that it could have been Antonio Banderas). When it was seven in the evening and I was starving, I reminded myself that I could be eating on time in the states, but I would likely be eating ramen instead of traditional Spanish cooking from my host mom. When the ATM was different than what I'm used to and after fifteen minutes I was ready to scream with frustration, I had to just roll with it because money for gelato is important. When there are no water fountains to be found I remind myself that there are trade offs for getting to visit a cool city like Barcelona (and accept that everyone here must be perpetually dehydrated because they're always drinking wine). There will always be things that are different and challenging, but that doesn't make them bad. If I could give someone tips for studying abroad they would be as follows:

1. Get some local currency ahead of time

I actually did this, but my roommate did not and we shared the frustration of not being able to operate the ATM's we encountered. Wherever you're going, at least have a small amount of local currency on hand whether you get it from the airport or a currency exchange location in your home country. Most gelato places don't want you to pay for three euros with a credit card.  

2. Resist the urge to sleep at odd hours

Try your hardest to only sleep when it's night time in the country you're visiting. The people who take naps during the day are the ones that take the longest to adjust to their new sleep schedule. Fight the urge to sleep at odd hours to avoid prolonged jet lag and awkward pictures of you sleeping in public.

3. Learn how to read a map 

This is especially true if you're going to a big city. You won't be able to use your phone to navigate everywhere unless you want to pay twice your tuition in roaming fees. Paper maps work even when there's no WiFi (amazing, I know). 

4. It's okay to not be okay

On the first night when you feel a rush of fear and uncertainty, it's okay to cry for a minute in the bathroom as long as you wipe the mascara stains off afterwards. When you can't watch the Bachelorette and discuss it with your mom, it's okay to be irritated and curse America for having such entertaining reality television. Just don't let those little moments become your trip. Find all of the good that outweighs the bad. 

Remember that study abroad is an amazing experience and you're lucky enough to be a part of it. Remember it even when someone (who is not Antonio Banderas) is so close you can feel him breathe on the back of your neck. It's nothing a scoop of gelato can't fix.